Movie Review: "Leave the World Behind" A Critical Analysis.
A Survivalist-Prepper Take on the Latest TEOTWAWKI Film
The recent release of the Netflix original film “Leave the World Behind” has generated a decent amount of buzz, and while I enjoy seeing various interpretations of the rather boiler-plate TEOTWAWKI (prepper acronym for- The End Of The World As We Know It) fair, I wanted to offer my opinion of this one, as a critical analysis for what they got right, what they got wrong, and the numerous “epic fails”.
Spoilers Aplenty; You’ve been warned!
Not a lot of set-up, just a run of the mill, upper middle class family living in New York City, whereby “Mom” decides to rent an Airbnb, so that Dad, and their two kids can get away for a few days.
Problem #1- This family.
Like many of you, I’m pretty sick of schtick. Mom wears the pants, she’s a mega-Karen that “hates people”, is “mad at the world” for reasons that she doesn’t fully understand, and wears it well, with a permanent resting bitch face, like her whole life has been spent smelling cat piss.
Dad’s a hapless, helpless, witless cuck, dutifully doing whatever he is told by his bitchy wife, his indolent and insolent children, and the entire world around him. He’s soft, weak, lacking personality, drive, verve, anything that would make him something more than just another household appliance; like a toaster oven.
Teenage Son is a now too typical white bread dork, and Daughter is an awkward, pre-teen (technically 13, but she acts like she is 9 or 10), semi-autistic, TV and tablet addicted, half-tard. Oh, and apparently like all modern TV children, their specialty is never doing what they are told, and instead, always doing the opposite, which in the real world of TEOTWAWKI would render them quickly as corpses, or worse…
It’s all just so trite! It’s been done to death in a million TV shows, movies, everything, you name it! It’s. Just. Played!
Problem #2- This shit song right at the beginning!
(Joey Bada$$ - THE REV3NGE, a song just as bad as the craptacular name)
As we will find out later on, there is a “seemingly, wholly unnecessary” (*1) racial component to this movie, but we’re not there yet. So, why was I just introduced to this overly typical and bland, white family unit, to then be slapped in the face with 3 minutes of this modern shitty rap music, that none of these characters would listen to? (instead, they listen to old school, early 70’s R&B/funk on their drive- “Kool & the Gang - Misled) It’s jarringly out of place, and frankly, it’s absolute shit music. Like terrible garbage modern crap-rap. I literally almost turned the movie off, just because it’s that insufferable, and goes on for way too long. However, I wanted to see this movie, so I just turned the volume down to barely audible, until it was over! Seriously, it’s shit!
(*1)- This is where I first begin to realize, that while almost everyone in this movie is white, doing white people stuff, and acting super white, this movie is actually, kinda made for black people. Hence the shitty opening music, and the behavior of multiple characters, etc., more on this later.
Thus, our hapless family begins their journey to the far away, but still very close, beautiful rented home on Long Island. Geographically, this doesn’t make much sense, but it will make even less later on, whereby all geography is thrown away for “plot advancement”.
Mom’s a workaholic, Dad’s a cardboard cut-out of a white man/father/husband, Son’s a skinny, pasty, annoying, Call of Duty playing teenager, and the Daughter’s a whiny little TV junkie, currently mainlining the end of the series “Friends” (but doesn’t think to get the rest of it downloaded before trekking off to far away land, that is either hours away, or mere minutes, hard to say; Both, neither, I don’t know)
Part 1- The House.
The place that they rent, and drive to, is very nice, elegant, finely decorated, stunningly beautiful. Arguably, too nice to be a weekend rental Airbnb. There is, of course, another underlying message about this fabulous home, which we will delve into a little later. It’s got a pool, an awesome layout, and a basement, all appearing nearly brand new. The house is pretty much flawless.
Here again, as they examine the place, we are presented with another classic old school R&B jam (maybe the O-Jay’s? Nope, it’s “Blackstreet - Never Gonna Let You Go), but we are 3 for 3 for the music score- Rap, Funk, R&B. A message? Perhaps.
Problem #3- Mom’s grocery store run, where she sees “A Prepper”!
While the kids frolic in the pool, and Dad mills about the house… being white, Mom makes a quick dash to this little Hamlet’s local store, to grab some provisions for the weekend. They never fully illuminate how long the family is meant to stay at Casa de Fabuloso, but apparently it costs roughly $2000.00, and we are led to believe that it’s a for 2-4 days or so.
While placing her items in their modest SUV, she sees our gritty prepper white guy, wearing a Carhartt and a dirty old Dallas Cowboys baseball cap (a southern team, meant to convey that he is kind of a redneck hick), loading his entire truck bed with long term survival food, cases of bottled water, and a bunch of other textbook prepper shit.
Why is this a problem? Because the reason why we call people “preppers”, is because we “prepare”, in advance, as a normal state of being. We don’t go to the store and make an “end of the world” supply run, right after we hear a rumor about “some shit going down”. This is a prepper red flag, like walking into the grocery store and buying all of the bottle water and matches that they have! “Hey everybody, look at me, I’m going crazy, and perhaps you should think about going crazy too!”
It just isn’t done. Unless, of course, you’re not really a prepper, and instead, are just some conspiracy nut, that panic buys at the first sign of trouble (you’re as good as dead), because you think you’ve got some really good intel… (you don’t).
However, after a few furtive and angry glances, both Mom and Grisly Prepper, go their own way. This is called “foreshadowing”, and it’s a really weak plot device. What are the odds that Mom runs into super-prepper at the grocery store parking lot? Oh, and since super-prepper is played by Kevin Bacon, we can now play “6 degrees of separation from Keven Bacon”
He’s loading up at the grocery store while Mom is getting her stuff,
He’s also one of their closest neighbors at weekend Shangri La,
He’s the contractor that renovated and beautified Casa de Fabuloso, and…
He’s who everybody turns to for help, after the SHTF! (shit hits the fan, that’s prepper lingo for everything going to shit)
But more on him later.
Mom makes her way back to the house, and sets Dad to cooking a fine meal for the family. Here again, cuck Dad does the cooking, because that’s apparently a “thing”, and far be it for Mom to do anything domestic… However, she did bring Dad a little surprise; A brand new pack of cigarettes! You see, as is so often the case, Dad is a closeted, occasional, secret smoker, which is why he instantly denies that the cigarettes are his, but it’s okay, because Mom has bought them for him, and even given him permission to smoke them, so long as the kids don’t see it. What a fucking shrew/cuck combo!
Then Dad pulls another stereo-typical cuck move, and subtly hints that maybe Mom and Dad can sneak in some quick sex, and after appearing to leave him crestfallen, again (the way he asks, the look on his face, his surprise when she agrees, screams that he isn’t used to getting his way on this), she offers him a whole 15 minute window to do the deed, so he shuffles and hurries off behind her (before she changes her mind), to get some Afternoon Delight with his not-so-blushing bride. Here again, in Married With Children fashion, sex is treated like some kind of woman’s chore/man’s lucky gift, which is further indication of how old and tired this kind of crappy TV family schtick has been in play. Lifetimes!
Problems #4 and #5- The Beach Trip (geography), and the oil tanker that runs aground.
#4 Geography- So, after their seemingly long’ish drive to the middle of nowhere Long Island, they go to the beach for some sun and fun. Here, semi-autistic little girl sees an oil tanker, miles from shore, and for no reason at all, takes notice. First of all, in this scene, the ocean stretches out to the horizon, which must mean they are near the south side of Long Island, but later, they are on the north side, and in fact, so close to New York City, that they can see the Manhattan skyline, as if it’s roughly 20 minutes away. However, during their entire ordeal, although seemingly quite close to the city, nobody either drives, or walks, to their location, from the collapsing hell-scape that NYC has surely become.
They’re so far away, and in the middle of nowhere, that nobody ever comes, but they are so close that they can still see it. Also, later on, Dad will go drive around for hours, never getting anywhere, even though they are minutes from the expressway, but he’s a dumb white cuck, so he gets lost…
#5 The Oil Tanker runs aground. Why? Did the “big event” knock out it’s navigation system? Also, all control of the ship, so that it just runs directly into the beach? None of the later calamities explain this. It’s a decent scene, to start the whole TEOTWAWKI scenario, but it’s left inexplicable, despite all that we find out later.
Anyway, our family is hanging out at the beach. Son wants to hook-up with some white girl, but she is too far away. Dad falls asleep, Mom reads a book (two more oh so typical behaviors), Son get’s some sun, no doubt thinking about that poontang, and little Girl just stares at the approaching ship the entire time, never breaking her gaze, and continues to chronicle it’s approach.
Frankly, it would have been better if it was something of a surprise, instead of being foreshadowed for the entire scene, but whatever…
Problem #6 The Weather. Is it cold outside, or warm? Mom wears a sweater and shorts at the beach, but prepper guy was wearing a Carhartt this morning, and throughout the film, we get mixed signals about whether it’s cool, warm, cold, hot, summer, spring, autumn? Son is just wearing shorts, getting some sun, but later on it seems like it’s almost cold outside?
Here again, Dad, stupid cuck that he is, after being awakened to the reality that the oil tanker that has been headed directly for them for hours, is now a few hundred yards offshore says “it’s gonna stop, it has to?”. Is he so clueless, that he cannot recognize that a huge ship can neither stop or turn when it’s less than a mile offshore, and on an azimuth to make direct, 90 degrees to shore, landfall? I just hate that they take every opportunity to make him a hapless fool.
Problem #7 It Begins.
Watching an enormous oil tanker run ashore at a tourist beach, in an area with no port, harbor, or obvious shipping lanes, is the oceanic equivalent of seeing a plane crash in the middle of a football field, but for some reason, our family isn’t nearly as alarmed by this as they should be. This is an enormously bizarre occurrence, but they seem to just take it in stride, and head off to Starbucks to grab some coffee. This is when they discover that the TV’s and Internet aren’t working, but ho hum, no biggee, I guess.
They get back to the house, still no Internet or TV, the kids just go to sleep, and Mom and Dad, have some wine, drop some F bombs (there is too much of this, it doesn’t seem real, or natural, or organic) and start playing Jenga? Again, is this the whitest thing they could think of?
The Plot Thickens… Guess Who is Coming to Dinner meets Karen and The Cuck!
And this is where the overtly racial aspect truly comes into frame. Whilst playing Jenga, Mom hears a noise, and tells wonder cuck to “get a bat”. This presents another cinematic theme that I utterly despise… How much of America has “a bat” or a “golf club” as their primary home defense weapon? Because if they exist at all, those people are goddamned fools!
And where did Mom think that Dad was going to get a baseball bat? She packed for him/them, did she pack one? They are staying in a multi-million dollar home that looks professionally decorated, does she think there is a Louisville Slugger laying around?
Also, if you’re such a mean old sour puss people hater, and you are going to the country for a weekend, why don’t you have anything with which to protect yourself? If the first sound is going to send you into a panic, why aren’t you armed in any way? Well, I digress…
Guess Who is Coming to Dinner?
After being initially frightened by “a sound”, the doorbell rings, and our slightly tipsy white couple is surprised to see a black couple at the doorway. A very dignified black gentleman wearing a tuxedo (no, I’m not kidding), and his younger female companion, sporting some kind of cocktail dress that doesn’t manage to cover all of her overly numerous cheap looking tattoos, (on her shoulders, arms, breasts, etc., like some ghetto fabulous hooker that just got out of jail for being a gang member’s bitch) and she is also the mouth of the couple, getting cheeky from the very first second of communications.
Very dignified black gentleman struggles to explain in very stilted and formal prose that he is the actual owner of the house, and was the agent that rented it to Mom. Gang Girl interrupts to translate very dignified black gentleman’s stilted speech into more common prose, so shocked Mom Karen, and Drunk Cuck Dad can understand what all this highfalutin language is really saying. VDBG (very dignified black gentleman) is just so educated and formal, that it’s difficult for him to speak easily to the common folk, but thankfully, his totally street, tattooed, ghetto fabulous daughter is there to break it down for Whitey and the Wife!
And Cue the Racial Component-
Mom is visibly shocked, alarmed, unsettled, and scared/angry that two unknown and unexpected black people have shown up at her door in the early hours of this now “suddenly cold” evening, and cannot keep the look of disgust and distrust from covering her already pissy looking face! She looks like she is smelling a skunk the entire scene.
This is the start of these starkly contrasting and one-note caricatures becoming grossly solidified.
Mom- Too much of a bitch, too negative, too nasty, and frankly, too annoying. Almost all of the other characters spend the entire movie from here on, just trying to get her to relax, think rationally, and chill the fuck out, but she can’t, because she just too much of a bitchy old careerist Karen. She’s too jaded, too mean, has seen too many shitty people… whatever, she’s just a bitch.
Dad- Too stupid, naive, soft, weak, pliant, he’s just a dud; A white dud. He’s lame, uncomfortable, and as beta as beta can get. Pretty much everyone in the movie treats him like the helpless cuck that he is, and that gets old. Despite everything that is going on, he never grows a pair, or becomes remotely manly. He’s white male window dressing.
VDBG- Very Distinguished Black Gentleman is too distinguished, too overly educated, etc., at least to be relatable. This is obviously on purpose, but it’s kind of silly. His daughter looks like some ghetto street tough, but he seems like he’s so educated, formal, and aloof, that he can barely deal with common people, speak their language, or understand them at all. How did his daughter end up being such a glaring contrast? He’s “on the board of the philharmonic”, he’s apparently in big finance, works with the mega-rich, his wife is a art dealer. It’s an unnecessary City Mouse-Country Mouse scenario. Also, if he was so fucking rich, he wouldn’t be renting his get away home to randos on the Internet!
GG, (Ghetto Girl), The Tattooed Princess- She too “street”, too abrasive, too forward, too mouthy, too confrontational. Also, I guess this actress is “somebody” (I don’t know, or care), but her tattoos are distracting and ugly. I’m serious, she looks like she got them in jail. Just random shit ink all over her body, and I feel like I see them, all of them, in almost every scene. She also is the one that vocalizes her maternally taught distrust of “white people”, which is fine, in slightly less “end of the world” circumstances, but given the scenario, you’d most likely appreciate having any ally you can find, irrespective of how you found them!
Son- too weak, lame, soft. All he is good for is picking on his little sister, like he’s 12 and she is 9, except he’s supposed to be a teenager, and chasing girls (his white Internet girl, and now, black ghetto girl with her trashy tattoos and stretch marks covered ghetto booty). He doesn’t even have some cocky male teenager vibe, he’s just a piece of cardboard.
Daughter- Weird, “nobody listens to me”, moody, sad, TV fixated because they are her only friends or some shit. She’s nothing but another weaker version of her Dad and older brother, but also mentally challenged in some way, but also, while being weak, soft, and stupid, apparently okay to just wonder off and play hero because she’s just so inspired and brave? No, it doesn’t make any sense.
Problem #8 Plot Holes and Universal Mistrust. VDBG and GG explain that they were at the Opera when there was a black-out in NYC, so they hastily drove to their country home, “all the way out here”. It’s a lie, because VDBG got word from one of his mega-rich clients, that something big was in the making, but they don’t tell the White Couple about this, because “reasons”. Also, White Couple doesn’t tell VDBG and GG about the oil tanker running aground, because of “reasons”, and instead, they dance through their little explanation of how this all came together, with Mom looking disgusted, like VDBG and GG are there to rob them, while Dad bends over backwards to be accommodating, and to diffuse the palpable poison between Mom the Karen, and GG the mouthy hoodlum, while seemingly unable to relate to anyone in the room.
Also, why didn’t the blackout affect Long Island? They’ve been without Internet all afternoon and evening, they watched a ship run ashore, one of many reported, and yet, Mom doesn’t trust the story presented by the black people? Also, VDBG and GG know the truth about why they have come to their country home, but decide to obfuscate this when speaking with the White Couple?
From here on, they all dance around each other, none wanting to tell the whole truth, due to some senseless mistrust, when the reality that some serious shit is going down is becoming incredibly obvious, and very dangerous for everybody. But “no”, let’s all keep our secrets about TEOTWAWKI, because “fuck it”, white and black people, ‘eh?
Anyway, the black couple wants to stay at their house, the white cuck Dad agrees, but Mom Karen wants to review the contract, while GG keeps emphasizing that it’s “their house” as if trying to antagonize the situation. Also, Mom has been told that there is a complete blackout in NYC, and stupid Dad offers to “call the company”, although already knowing that nothing is working, GG is offended that her dad offers for them to stay in the basement, since the White Folk are on the main floors of the house.
Interlude- Here’s the thing, if serious shit really starts going down, people would need to be about 1,000 times more practical and pragmatic, not a bunch of liars, antagonize’ers, triggering, bitchy, bitches. Anyone with any sense at all, especially people that live in NYC and “hate people”, should know what a gigantic catastrophe that blackout would be, for all 8 million residents. Not getting all shitty about renting an Airbnb. Frankly, bitch, your apartment might already be destroyed, looted, or burned to ground, you have no idea, it’s NYC! I wouldn’t “piss a bitch” with the owners of where you are staying, like you’re fighting over the last Beanie Baby at Target, you’re potentially already super fucked!
Also, if GG wants to make it to the next scene, you better shit-can all that acrimony, especially if you “don’t trust white people” and know the truth about what is potentially going on? Do you want to sleep in your car? Or make enemies of the people that will be right upstairs while you snooze?
In a real, no shit, TEOTWAWKI situation, you’d better mind your P’s and Q’s, lest someone just smoke your ass, because you are an unknown quantity and an adversarial rival for food and supplies; Just sayin’.
Mom- “I’m sorry, I just don’t feel comfortable staying in a house with…. (pregnant pause) …. people I don’t know”. Oh, we get it, she’s a racist, and was just one slip of the tongue away from saying… uh, well, you know, “that word”. This was so strained and forced, so intentional. I guess this is what we get from Barack and Michelle Obama, everyone is a racist, just waiting to say the “N-word”, but barely catching themselves before they do.
They try way too hard here to make Mom seem unnecessarily uncomfortable with what’s happening, when she is the one that remarked earlier that her dumb kids were shockingly un-shocked by the beached oil tanker, and just moved on.
Here’ s the rub- Everyone is learning more and more about how everything is falling apart, but still acting like they think everything is still pretty normal. It strains credulity.
Anyway, more awkward conversation ensues, VDBG has a fat envelope of cash to pay off the White Couple for half of their fee, and he also owns a gun. Mom doesn’t trust them, Dad is a cucky wuck, GG is mouthy, and VDBG is the only tolerable adult in the movie. Mom basically says that she doesn’t trust them because they are black, or that the house is too nice to be theirs, maybe he’s the handyman and GG is the maid? Good God!
It’s all very fucking tedious, but they share some drinks, and deal with it, and the Black Couple is allowed to stay the night, in their own home, and Mom just has to deal with it. That’s just night one, but it’s so terse that it’s unpleasant and jarringly awkward. Mom asks to see the I.D. of VDBG, but he stormed out of the symphony without his coat that contained it, GG storms out of the house, because she just can’t tolerate uppity Karen’s bitchy’ness, Dad and VDBG are cool, sharing a drink, but that’s mostly because Dad is too cucked to be bothered by anything real. The Emergency Broadcast System goes off, and only GG seems to get the larger significance, etc., etc. GG is pissed that they gotta stay in the basement, and eludes to them somehow being servants to Whitey (doing their laundry) next.
The racial strife seems to be the point of the whole movie. It’s less of “Leave the World Behind”, and more like “How Do Blacks versus Whites work at the end of the world?”
Anyway, the EBS cuts briefly to a report of a nationwide cyber attack, but none of them see it, so it’s just to let us, the viewer, know that things are unraveling in a major way, while our 6 friends continue to try to figure it out.
Day Two-
Mom wakes up to a bunch of fleeting images of push notifications on her phone, but they disappear before she can show anyone. Dad tries to go to town, but gets lost, gets scared, and also meets a random Hispanic woman in the middle of nowhere, while lost, but decides to leave her on the side of the road, because he can’t understand her, and because he’s racist too, I suppose. He sees a drone dropping red flyers, which freaks him out.
Daughter starts to see some kind of deer swarm…
Problem #9- All the stupid animal shit!
Daughter keeps seeing masses of bizarre acting deer, and later, flamingos in the pool. They get some chatter about “animal migrations being messed up in the South”, but this is never explained, and honestly, it’s a stupid diversion. Nothing about this story explains why the deer would act weird, or disrupt bird migrations, but whatever, I guess it’s just an excuse to show something odd.
VDBG goes to a neighbor’s house to get their Satellite Phone, which doesn’t work, because the satellites are apparently not working either. However, he sees a lot of unexplained debris, and then wanders over to the coast, which again seems to face the open ocean, and sees that a plane has crashed on the beach, and then witnesses another plane crash in the exact same spot.
Problem #10- First the Ship, Now the Planes?
Why are planes still in the air hours after this has started? Why are they crashing on an empty beach? They have Nav systems, they don’t just crash if they lose GPS. Are they “hacked” too? Hacked, but still flying? And if it’s an attack, why wouldn’t the terrorists direct them to crash into cities, or military targets, or something? Just onto a beach on Long Island? Same with the ship, why wasn’t it pointed to a port to crash? Why just a beach?
None of this makes any sense, was never explained, and doesn’t jive with anything else in this supposed story. It’s just random chaos porn, without meaning. VDBG doesn’t tell anyone about the plane crash, initially, because of “reasons”, but says that he fell in a pool!?
Here again, more proof that shit is getting very serious, but he hides it from the group, like that will help? You get the sense that he doesn’t want to panic his daughter, because her mom was flying back from Morocco for her Art Dealer gig, and didn’t want her to process that her mom was likely dead, since all the airborne planes have likely crashed, but his GG daughter never seems to panic about anything, except the white people she is forced to deal with, and potentially being returned to servitude because the world is collapsing?
Son and Daughter wonder off into the woods, so he can pick on her more, and so he can get bit by a bug, which maybe makes him sick to death later (maybe, this is uttered, but never makes any sense at all, especially because he becomes very sick, very fast, and his bloody teeth just fall out like he’s dying, but it’s really just a plot vehicle to force them to go see the prepper for medicine).
Oh, at this point, Son gets some Jungle Fever, and starts leering at GG, taking zoomed in pictures of her, so he can try to wack-off to them later (not kidding), but apparently cannot succeed. Later still, GG tells her father VDBG, that Dad probably also wants to fuck her, because apparently, every white male within sight is longing for some trashy black Ghetto Girl booty. The son, I could “get”, but the Dad too? I guess if you smoke a joint with a black girl, you naturally try to screw her too.
(sub-note, I don’t know how many “fucks” are in this movie, but it’s too many. They seem out of place, in part, because it’s almost the only curse word uttered at all. No “shits, damns, bitches, cunts, assholes, dicks”, just lots of fucks)
Oh, and GG doesn’t want to swim, so Mom Karen asks if it’s “because she doesn’t want to mess up her hair”, which again, is presented like it’s a White Woman making a crack about a Black Girl’s hair, but plenty of girls don’t swim plenty of times, because of her hair, white or black. But GG corrects her, and says it because one of her kids might have peed in the pool, even though her kids are 13 and 16/17’ish? Not 5 or 6.
VDBG tells Mom that he “read the markets” and knew something was coming, but it’s all just babble, no real facts, nothing tangible. Mom still doubts the severity of everything, despite all that has happened, and the alerts on her phone, but when she is told of the multiple plane crashes, she suddenly starts to get alarmed, which is followed by much of her time spent “losing it”. They actually hear NYC being bombed by aircraft, though they don’t know it yet, even though it’s later presented as being about 10-20 miles away. (they can hear it from the house, they later can see it across the bay/harbor).
Then…
Problem #11 The Mysterious, Excruciating Sound
Never explained, never makes sense, just comes out of nowhere, affecting everyone, everywhere, and it’s debilitating. At this point, you think maybe this will be an alien thing, but it’s just another fun, pointless, unexplained plot “event”.
Karen Mom flips-out, and blows her lid, finally. Also, blurts out the plane crash story, in front of GG. But she doesn’t care about her mom, just uses the conversation as another chance to accuse Mom of being racist because she doesn’t think they “have told her everything”, which they haven’t, and they know it and discuss it. Karen loses her shit, but GG stays all clam, and mouths off about her being racist, again.
Dad comes home, freaked out too. You see. VDBG sees a plane crash on top of a plane crash, and he’s cool. GG learns about everything and isn’t even phased, but White Mom loses her shit, and White Dad loses his shit too.
Mom realizes that the Grisly Prepper Guy must have known what was coming, because she remembers him buying all that shit, and VDBG explains that he’s a local prepper, and the contractor that renovated his lovely home. Apparently Prepper Guy the Contractor also has an amazing talent for making truly fabulous homes, even though he seems like a wild eyed local hick, more on him later…
Dad tells his story (except for leaving Hispanic woman to fend for herself), choking back the tears. White family decides to leave, and “go to her sister’s in New Jersey” (totally implausible, stupid, and the last thing you’d want to try after finding out everything they just found out, but it allows for more plot constructs, so who cares?) which the highly educated, wise, and calm VDBG tries to talk them out of, because it’s literally a stupid idea, but they do it anyway. GG is thrilled, because she never trusted them anyway, and wants them gone. GG also processes that her mom is most likely dead, but she seems rather unaffected by this realization. I guess she’s too tough and “street” to get bogged down in dead mom and world collapse.
Oh, and Dad needs directions from VDBG, as to how to find the Interstate, despite having driven there two days prior, but I guess the dumb cuck is just rattled from getting lost just a little while earlier when he was fleeing the drone dropped flyers, and abandoning the Hispanic woman, and in general, losing his weak mind.
Problem #12 The Big, New, All White Tesla Car Crashed Road Block
Whilst hearing sirens in the distance, our dumb White family comes upon a giant pile-up of dozens, maybe hundreds of crashed Tesla auto-driving cars, all slammed together, blocking the road, with no drivers, or anyone for that matter, in sight. More white Teslas start coming from behind them to add to the pile-up, and panicked family freaks out again, after dumb cuck Dad thinks they might be people that could help, not processing that he’s seeing hundreds of the exact same car crashed in front of him. Luckily, Mom figures it out, and saves the day, by taking the wheel, and driving them out of there, while dumb Dad fetters about stupidly, because he’s still a dumb cuck.
At the end of this scene, we pan out to see that they were again, very close to NYC, and also, very near thousands of cars crashed on roads, and bridges, but apparently, none of these people made it out alive, which is another reason that despite being within view of the largest population center in America, not one single person ever makes it out to “the boonies”, where they were staying, because they are just so far away from everything? Again, geography; they’re far away, but very close, can see it, hear it, but nobody can make it to them, or does? It’s a gigantic plot hole, that is alternately used, when convenient to have them very close, but very far away, at the exact same time. It’s glaring, and dumb! (made more so because it’s used as the final scene to demonstrate just how fucked everything really is!)
Then our now humbled White Family has to return to the home of the Black Dad and GG, and suddenly, the shoe is on the other foot! How quaint! “here we are, all of us back together again, only this time, it’s you that has showed up back here! Take that Whitey! It’s a dumb maneuver, which just proves that the whole trip was just an empty, temporary, plot device to do the Tesla thing, and begin to show us that the whole area is in total ruin… but our characters still don’t realize just how bad it is!
Blah.
Now, right back to where we were, Dad smokes his joint (really a THC vape, but it’s the same vibe) with GG (and apparently wanted to tap dat ass, after she asks him if he ever fucked one of his students), and Mom gets drunk with VDBG, where they too bond, and get drunk, and decide to listen to some of his huge record collection (their power is still on, and the water works, it’s all good). He wants to listen to some classic Jazz, but Karen wants some more modern Hip Hop, so they can dance, and hug, and almost cheat on their spouses.
Yeah, the proverbial Breakfast Club scene, where they separate and pair off in private; Dad the Cuck getting stoned with GG, and Mom the Karen getting drunk and romanticizing with VDBG. They bicker, make up, argue, bond, dance, hug, etc. Again, it’s a weak plot turn.
After their night of enjoying more booze, food, and wine (I guess they have plenty of supplies, so they never seem to worry about running out of anything, or rationing anything, or procuring anything. Apparently they are oblivious), VDBG admits that he got his tip from his mega-rich client, but it still doesn’t really open anyone’s eyes as to how grim their situation has become.
After all the frivolity, as everybody is laying down for bed, is when GG finally confronts her father, the VDBG, that they are making a mistake by trusting White People, ie. this family that is staying with them.
This is rather offensive, in part, because she seems like the least trust worthy person here, except for the dumb kids, but that’s just the usual being stupid kids thing, not being nefarious or paranoid backstabbing plotters.
Oh, and dumb little girl shares a story from The West Wing TV show, which concludes with her saying that she “is done waiting”. Ughhh
Day Three- The Prepper Confrontation
Son wakes up feeling sick, and his teeth turn bloody and start falling out. There is no reason for this, but the whole “teeth falling out” thing is a classic cinematic trope for being very, very sick, with no explanation. Regrettably, it’s just a plot device to set-up the worst, dumbest, most annoying scene in the movie. The usual schtick is “the sick kid”, whereby Mom and Dad must “do something” to help, in a scenario where there is almost nothing they can do.
Naturally, they decide that the only thing to do, is to go ask the Grisly Prepper for “some medicine”, assuming that he has some antibiotics. Thus, VDBG secretly grabs his gun, and him, Dad, and super sick Son head over to seek help.
Prepper is super cagey from the start, which is understandable and relatable, and he asks them to step off of his porch before he comes out. He then appears with a shotgun in his hands. They ask for help, he says no, they try to convince him, he lays it all out for them, and again says no, so now our VDBG decides to pull his gun, and point it at the Grisly Prepper, and we have ourselves a Mexican standoff. I don’t know why VDBG decides to risk his life for Dad’s Son, but apparently, this is where he wants to make his stand, which is very foolish, because if Grisly Prepper smokes all three of them, they will have left a woman, a 20’s something girl and a 13 yo female child, alone in the world that has collapsed, and without a single male to protect them in any way.
Now, finally, Dad the Cuck decides he has the moment he has waited for; He pleads, and weeps, and cries like a bitch, for Grisly Prepper to help them, and begs, and fully prostrates himself, offering to give him all of his money for this medicine to save his son (we don’t know what is wrong with the son, or why he is sick, or what antibiotic Prepper has, or if it will work, etc.) Cut scene, Prepper takes the $1,000, and gives the medicine to Dad, ending the Mexican standoff, and all is well.
Prepper, instead of killing them, like he should have, not only gives up the antibiotics, for cash, which is absurd, (in this situation, a bottle of antibiotics could very well mean the difference between life and death, for someone you actually care about, whereby 10, $100 bills is essentially worthless) he instead tells them that one of his friends likely built a bomb shelter in a rich neighbor’s basement.
First of all, he should have never let them get on his porch, and if he did, he should have only spoken with them, and nothing more. Better still, especially since they didn’t just scram when told, probably killed them while he had the edge. They had a gun, and probably some supplies at their house, and this is end of days type shit, so there are no half measures.
Also, he NEVER would have given up the antibiotics, least of all for cash. No amount of cash is worth a bottle of antibiotics in this scenario. Moreover, if you make this deal with them now, what will you do in a day, or a week, when they come back, needing more? Water? Food? Medical Supplies? Ammo? Then you will have to kill them, but you will have already lost whatever you gave them before, i.e. the bottle of antibiotics!
But most important of all, you know what is happening, and you’re going to tell them about a bunker that they would otherwise have never found? Knowing that it’s TEOTWAWKI, and you’re just going to “give up” an immeasurable supply of food, water, weapons, ammo, and perhaps a shelter can can survive this level of chaos and mayhem?
No way, in Hell, that a real prepper does this, any of this.
The Stupid Conclusion-
Daughter apparently got up before dawn, and wondered off, so GG and Mom go looking for her, and after bickering some more, bonding over their mutual hatred for everyone, including each other, they too confront the gang of wild deer, that are apparently possessed by Satan, or have decided to use the breakdown of society as their chance to exert power over humans… this stupid shit is never even remotely explained, it’s silly, and makes for a really dumb scene where Mom and GG scare off the deer by yelling at them, and then continue their quest to find the dumb daughter, who is on a bicycle powered walkabout through the woods, because she said she was “tired of waiting”, and apparently decided to roam the Earth like Kane in Kung Fu.
Part of the sheer stupidity of all this, is that this dumb, fractured group, has yet to sit down and have a single, serious, combined conversation about their circumstances, and what it all means. Like little girls not wondering off, or letting the group get all split up, or that they have finite resources, or that if you get hurt, or bitten by some random poisonous bug, you are probably going to die; Nope, none of that.
Thus, now, Son has his meds, so he is on the mend, and the three men head back home. GG and Mom keep looking for the Daughter, wondering deeper into the woods. They sniff out her trail, and begin to follow her to The Thornes House; where the Prepper told the men there was probably a doomsday bunker in their basement. Daughter apparently used her divine autistic powers to sniff out the new digs, and commences to chow down on every sugary snack in the kitchen.
Then seeing a light from the basement, wanders down and finds a bomb proof bunker, loaded with food, water, a stand alone source of electricity, every comfort you can imagine, and a TV with an enormous DVD collection, including the TV show “Friends”, so she finally gets to finish her show. It’s just so stupid.
However, while the two women are searching for her, they hear more bombs, and make their way to the coast, where they see that downtown NYC is being bombed by aircraft, for no known reason.
So, the world is ending, they have found a bunker with everything they need for at least months, and can be safe until they run out of supplies, again.
NYC is done for, destroyed, chaotic, in ruins, etc., and our movie ends on the worst possible news imaginable, coupled with finding the best possible thing they could ever find, though having done nothing at all to earn it.
They are somehow “saved” by two dumb decision; Daughter wandering off to find everything they need by happenstance, because of her stupid quest to finish “Friends”, and confronting the Grisly Prepper in a scenario that should have gotten them killed, and probably still will, since he knows about the bunker, and that he told them about it, and is obviously way more prepared for what is happening than they are.
I assume this is left open for a sequel, on purpose, to be made if this show is popular enough.
This whole show was marginal, at best, especially with all the interwoven stupidity and nonsense, the grating racial aspects, and the overall ineptitude of everyone involved, so hopefully, if they do make a sequel, they get better writers, dump all the “plot armor”, can it with the meaningless racial strife shit, and focus on what could otherwise be a pretty decent story… and stop it with the stupid animal shit, and mystery noise, those were both just garbage.
That was the most straight forward review of this movie that I've seen so far, the best actually. Thanks for pointing out how utterly over-the-top stupid it actually was. I'm sorry to admit that I actually enjoyed watching it because it was so awful. It's right up there with Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.
I think it gives us some insight into how much the Obama's like to try to fake us out among other things.
Point #1: You define SHTF, but fail to define TEOTWAWKI. I thought it was some sort of yearly festival until I was puzzled about the the context and looked it up.
Point #2: When it comes to geography, as long as Long Island is not featuring snow-capped mountains or cactus count your blessings.
The guy wants to perform the marital act with that raging Feminazi? That's some imagination he must have.
If I recall, the I-278 spur touches Long Island. Although for the life of me I don't know why anybody would think Long Island is escaping New York City. If I was in New York City when the World was coming to an end my direction would be due north into the Catskills.
Yes, the oil lanker just running aground is over the top. If a captain at sea loses his geostat, he still has his compass, and, of course, the stars. The ship is not totally automated. In fact, the navigation is not automated at all. They still have that large rudder wheel and a helm just like on Mutiny on the Bounty. Even aircraft carriers have them.
When it comes to the weather- just be thankful if two scenes after a snowstorm the leaves are not on the trees. I have seen driving scenes where they keep cutting from the trees having leaves to the trees being bare, and back. I recall one scene that was hilarious. Every time they cut to the driver, the trees had leaves. Whenever the passenger was looking out the window, there was snow on the ground.
You really tortured yourself watching this thing.